Epic Fail. That's me. I did not get up and walk, and I am not going to be drug free for tonight's sleep. I am so exhausted that I emailed the doctor first thing and told her I was at my wits end. I was on the verge of tears and felt like my eyes could close randomly. The nurse called me and told me she wants to try one more sleep aid. I asked for Xanax, but she said this is better and in the same family as Xanax and Ativan. I am willing to give it a go, I really don't have much of a choice if I would like to function. I am amazed at how long a person can go without sleep, kind of scary.
Instead of walking, partly due to the rain, I met a friend for coffee. I felt like I was slurring my words and incoherent I was so tired. I also didn't like how I felt when I drove, glad I didn't have far to go. I will have to start making weekend coffee dates once school starts, I really enjoy it.
The rest of the day I took care of a lot of little things that needed my attention. I also had an appointment with the surgeon today. She said everything looks great. She felt around and made sure it was healing correctly. I told her about the tightness and she said it was all part of the process. Your body just doesn't heal on the AC so I am playing catch up.
We talked about the timeline of my treatments and she had her nurse put a call into the plastic surgeon for an appointment in November. When she was on the phone with the receptionist I heard her say, "No, January is unacceptable. This is the patient Dr. missed in March, she needs to get in sooner than that." She even told the girl to go tell the doctor personally that he will NEED to make room for me. Go girl! The receptionist said that she would have to move things around and call her back and let me know what they come up with. I will take whatever they give me at this point. The November appointment would be to get the ball rolling. My ideal plan would to have the surgery done over Christmas break. That would give me extra time at home to heal, since I have the two weeks off from work. But that means he would have to be available, and healthy! That would be a great boost to my situation to have that portion done before the new year... Fingers crossed. My nurse said she would also ask if there was any way of going direct to implants. Ask away! She was also telling me about the procedure where they use body fat to make new breasts, this is the 12 hour surgery...sorry no. I don't want to heal in two spots and have risk of infection and twice as much pain. I will go for the implants and be happy.
I am finalizing all that needs to be done before our trip for our house/dog/landscaper sitter. When we come back we will have a nicely weeded and mulched yard and a happy dog... should have scheduled a cleaning lady too....
Heidi is going to pick me up early tomorrow to get coffee and head to chemo. I am hoping that I get some well deserved sleep tonight. Watch it work and the one day I have to get up out of bed at a certain time I won't be able to...Murphy's Law... maybe not...maybe it will all work out great!! I want to be in bed by 9:30. I did not reach my step goal today, but I am not going to beat myself up about it. I won't meet it tomorrow either with sitting for treatment and a car ride. I will make it up on the trip. I am not sure I will be able to blog on the trip, the house does not have wifi. If we go to a coffee shop, I will check in and update, if not...Hugs to you all and thank you for all of your support!!!
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